OK, so I don't post as often anymore...

I'm sorry, and as I learned on saturday night, people do get mad at me for not posting.  So, that leads into my little quiz for everyone, it's called the "Do I Suck At Life" Quiz...
1.  I have read the blog...
A.  Every time there's a new comment
B.  Every time there's a new post
C.  A few times
D.  My first time
E.  Never, someone is taking this quiz for me
 
2.  When driving I use my blinkers when...
A.  Changing Lanes and Turning
B.  Changing Lanes or Turning, but not the other
C.  When I feel like letting people know I'm moving left or right
D.  Never
E.  When going straight
 
3.  I shower...
A.  Daily or close enough
B.  More than once a day
C.  Miss a day here and there (more than 5%)
D.  Only after sweating super-large amounts
E.  Between once a week and Never
 
4.  I find this quiz...
A.  Funny
B.  Stupid
C.  Silly
D.  Pointless
E.  Annoying cause I know it pertains to my no-reading, pointless-blinker-using, foul-smelling self
 
Now, score 0 points for each A, 1 for B, 2 for C, 3 for D, 5 for E.  If your score is between 0 and 3, you are not bad at life, 4-7  Need work, 8-12 kinda suck at life, but have hope, 12 or more, you SUCK at life, please please please don't reproduce.
 
Now that that's over, the fun stuff.... :)  So this might make you think I'm a horrible human being but I did see the funniest title to a book ever, and the second funniest.  The no. 2 (that would mean the shit) and the second funniest was called "Knocked out by my Nugga Nuggas."  And yes, the main character was talking about her funbags.  I mean, thinking about all the fun names for them, and I've never in my life thought up nugga nuggas, and there it was on the cover of  a book.  Next thing I know, I'll be talking to someone going "so these nugga nuggas, you shoulda seen them." and they'll look at me like there's something wrong with me and then I'll know that they scored five points on question 1.  But it really is a fun word, you'll see me throw it in on nugga nugga occasion rather pointlessly.  If I ever decide to have a nugga nugga serious post (HA!) it'll probably be in there to lighten the mood.
 
The funniest book though (and this is what might make people think I'm horrible) was Christopher Reeve's book called "Nothing is Impossible."  This, coming from a man who can't nugga nugga walk.  I mean, I know he's trying to be inspirational and all, but if i was him and writing an inspirational book, I'd have a different title.  Maybe he could use one similar to Lance Armstrong's Autobiography "It's not about the bike" and call it "it's not about the neck/chair/suck 'n' blow".  Speaking of LA, he's back in yellow!! and that's awesome.  Sorry, had to interject a little bit of nugga nugga cycling for my boy there.  But other names could have been "It's not so bad", "At least I can still write this book", "From superman to guy who gives inspirational speeches, and really, what's the difference between the two", or something like that.  I think the best two names he could have given it though are "Catcher in the Rye" and "Knocked out by my nugga nuggas" but sadly, both of those are already taken.
 
So what else is on my mind....let's see....I'm looking around, and i've already talked about bobbleheads (you know you love that post) and well, now it's time to talk about the funny event from last night.  I got accused of being homophobic!!!!! Now that's some funny shit, cause for those of you that know me, I'm one of the least homophobic straight men I know, I would say I'm homophillic, but that kinda sounds like I'm gay myself, which mind you isn't the case (I love the ladies, and the ladies kinda tolerate me).  I think I might use the term Homogenous for people like me.  Why?  cause first it's a chemistry term, and I love me some chem.  Second, things that are homogenous mix well, and I mix well with the gay folk.  And that makes me realize, you ever notice that since about '90 folk music has taken a profoundly lesbian turn.  Which there's nothing wrong with it (it's kinda hot), but I liked the music from back in the day when the folk artists weren't about that but about sticking it to the man (and not like that, get your nugga nugga mind out of the gutter).  I'm talking Joplin, Dylan, that kinda thing.
 
Last not before I stop this ranting and raving long as post of today, I love food.  I mean, food is the bestestestestestest stuff ever.  Cause myself and one mr. perner realized the other day as i was eating bbq sauce that if i ever lost my sense of taste, i might just kill myself.  I mean, really, what's the point to life if i can't enjoy a big mac, or oj (not the wife-murdering one, but i'm sure he tastes delightful), or garlic, yummy.  I mean, really, taste is by far the best sense, cause it rocks my face off.  I mean, take away sight, I can't cook (be a little dangerous with the knife), but someone can still cook for me.  Actually, can't cook that well without hearing either (timers go off), and touch, well, i'd probably burn the hell out of myself.  But taste, your entire life would be normal, but not even 1% as fun, cause food is the nugga nugga shit.